zirconium

The next lesson will be happening tomorrow, but I haven't opened the books yet. I just can't seem to bring myself to sit and learn consecutively. And thus, the gaps in knowledge show more and more. It's like in school, when there are classes you enjoy, that seem fun, that are easy. And so you don't take them seriously until they turn more and more complicated and the pile of things to learn grows bigger and bigger. And you think, "If I had learned just a bit every day from the start, it would still be easy now." Which is a true thought and it should make you sit and start the learning, but it somehow does the opposite: it frustrates you . . .

Really, I don't know what it is. Why I am not willing to take the time to learn and instead expect to catch the verb forms in flight, by hearsay. Expect Italian to be effortless. Even though I never was good at learning vocabulary and grammar. And taking the Italian book to Majorca and leaving it there in the suitcase to bring it home didn't really solve the problem either. On the other hand, I would have felt silly learning Italian words while sitting under the Spanish sun. But then, both are Mediterranean places. And better to feel a bit silly while learning than ending up without answers.

-- in Wor(l)ds Apart (Folded Word, 2012)